Cindy Gullo, LCPC - Therapist & Counselor
The Blog

You Are the Secret to Raising a Confident Daughter

walking her confident, teen daughter to college

Helping your teenage daughter grow into a strong, self-assured woman may seem like an overwhelming challenge, but a little guidance and encouragement from you can make all the difference. With a few simple steps, you can set her up for a life of happiness, success, and healthy relationships. Here’s how:

Encourage Her to Try New Things

She may not be good at everything, but she’s certainly good at some things. By getting involved in clubs, sports, or a part-time job, she’ll be able to find something she enjoys, while learning important life skills, such as time management, problem-solving, and perseverance. Plus, it will show her that real satisfaction doesn’t come from how many “likes” she gets on social media, but instead from working hard, reaching goals, and nurturing relationships.

Prepare Her to Fail

No one wants to see their daughter struggle, but hard times and disappointments will inevitably happen throughout her life. Help her to be ready for them! Emphasize the lessons learned along the way, the pros of experiencing different situations, and the importance of doing her best, no matter what the end result may be. She may not always be the best at what she does, but as long as she is striving to be the best version of herself, she has reason to be proud.

Help Her Find Her Voice

Encourage her to express herself when she is frustrated or upset. If she has a problem with a friend, teacher, or boss, help her find the courage to confront the other person and let them know how she’s feeling. Without being pushy, ask her about her day, friends, and classes, so she becomes comfortable talking openly about what is important to her and will be more likely to stand up for herself when she needs to.

Avoid Micromanaging

When you see your daughter struggling, you may be tempted to tell her exactly how to fix the problem, or worse, step in to solve it for her. This is a surefire way to crush her self-esteem, since you’re essentially saying, “I don’t trust you to handle the situation appropriately, so I will.” Instead, resist the urge to take control and give her space to solve the problem herself. After she has handled it, praise her for her efforts, even if they aren’t up to your liking.

Practice What You Preach

It may not seem like it, but your daughter is absorbing everything you do and say. Be careful how you speak about your own body and insecurities. Instead of commenting about your latest diet or how much weight you’ve lost exercising, focus on getting healthier, stronger, and feeling your best. Likewise, avoid critiquing her weight or appearance. Complimenting her on how well she’s doing in school, how helpful she’s being around the house, or how hard she’s working on her hobbies are much better ways to show her your love and support while boosting her self-esteem. Anyone can compliment her appearance, but noticing her positive character traits will leave a lasting impact!

Learn More About Raising a Confident Daughter

Building confidence can take time, so be patient – with your daughter and yourself. Once she sees that you believe in her and has the opportunity to succeed, she will believe in herself. For more tools to help her boost her self-esteem, contact me today. Together we can assist your daughter in becoming the strong woman you always knew she could be!